Mrunmayee

This is a book by Go. Ni. Dandekar. I was introduced to it through a chapter in Marathi textbook in 9th or 10th. The chapter called the main character ‘Manu’ and I thought her name must be Mrunmayee.. But when I read the book soon later, I found her name as ‘Manorama’… in fact now am not even sure that it was Manorama… I remember her as ‘Mrunmayee’ - Made up of sand!

The book tells story of a young girl, who was born in Konkan and brought up in 'Desh'- somewhere in Satara perhaps. The story narrates much beyond the love for land. She lived in the dreams of Konkan, got married and went there finally with irresponsible husband and cruel mother in law. She worked in the field- she blossomed the small garden at backyard, worshiped land; loved it, maintained it… she withstood brutality of mother in law; lust of unfaithful husband, physical torture and much more. And then she grew spiritually at the same time. For her, entire world turned Krishna- eternal love of many distinguished lovers!! And finally, after her husband’s death, when a neighbor tried to assault her, she calmly invited him to do so!!!!!! Like Meera…!!
That was terrific. World considers it graceful to maintain purity of body. World worships ‘Johar’s! And here, Meera and this Manu, bother least about it.. They ask Krishna to witness the assault and they see him in trees, creepers, rural house, cows and sculptures!! It needs tremendous spiritual power.

Other day I tried to play with myself; I tried to ‘love’ Krishna! And then I imagined his presence in everything; in trees, roads, breezes... oh, believe me, it was wonderful!! The very realization that someone whom you love with all your heart and soul, meets you through every external input, through all the sense organs, was simply mind blowing… when I thought of him touching my cheeks in the form of wind; walking with me in the form of road; entertaining me in the form of dancing trees and entering within me as breath; I reached perfect peace! without fear of losing him in-between…

But then, it was very difficult to love him first of all! For couple of hours, this illusive state of mind stayed without complaints, but later, intensity decreased. No, I couldn’t be Meera… It couldn’t be the eternal state of my soul…

Hey, and then, I need not try all this… especially when a wonderful future might unfold soon in this country of freedom, opportunities and excellence! A wonderful future full of all mortal pleasures!! After all, I am an ordinary individual… my happiness lingers around my tiny house, my lovely family, husband, kids, relatives, patients and my work. I would visit Pandharpur or Dvaraka at my convenience, after managing my house and husband and would still call him (Vitthala/ krishna) my boyfriend for all my life!! :-)